Above all, Broadway star Eva Noblezada values being present—and it took a lot of self-reflection to get to where she is now.
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A lot of us find empowerment in pushing past all our struggles just to function every day—what else can we do?—but it also takes courage to know when you need to reflect and find a different way to deal with the pressures and expectations of life in general.
The tough thing about self-reflection is we rarely want to look deep within and truly see what we’re doing wrong with ourselves. From personal to professional struggles, we often ignore the inner turmoils that turn into storms, pushing it to the back of our mind until it consumes us. But for one artist whose passion lies under the stagelights, she knows when to brave the storm and when to find refuge in its eye.
Photo by Matthew Murphy
Filipino-Mexican-American actress and singer Eva Noblezada has had a whirlwind career in the past decade. What she’s learned thus far as she performs almost every night for years in front of a crowd of thousands is borne out of wanting to take care of herself as meticulously and attentively as she takes care of each character she embodies.
An hour before the curtains go up for that evening’s staging of The Great Gatsby on Broadway, the actress and singer sat down with NYLON Manila for a conversation all about looking after herself, balancing vulnerability with confidence, and knowing when it’s time to hit the brakes and slow things down.
PERFECTION AND AUTHENTICITY
Photo by Matthew Murphy
A musical theater kid in every sense of the word, Eva Noblezada started young. She went to school at the Northwest School of the Arts, her talent, training, and drive coming through as she became a finalist at the National High School Musical Theater Awards in 2013. At 17, she was cast as Kim in the West End revival of acclaimed musical Miss Saigon, which kickstarted a stage career that would eventually make her a renowned force in the world of theater.
“Grateful doesn’t feel like a big enough word,” she says about being able to go up on stage and make an impact on other people’s lives. “I think about my family, how it took generations and generations for me to be here, how I’m carrying the support of my ancestors and how that is the air under my wings.”
In between playing Kim in Miss Saigon on the West End and on Broadway and originating the role of Eurydice on Hadestown on Broadway, Eva worked on Les Misérables at the West End and ventured into film and, eventually, television.
IG/bwaygatsby
From stage to screen, her singing and acting chops have allowed her to move through the industry at a rapid pace, adjectives like mesmerizing, gifted, powerful, poised, and astonishing trailing behind her like glitter. For her role in Miss Saigon, Eva was nominated for the 2017 Tony Award for Best Actress in a Leading Role in a Musical—the same award she was up for in 2019 as Eurydice on Hadestown. The actress and singer also has a Grammy Award for Best Musical Theater Album lined up on her shelf, shared with the cast of Hadestown.
Now 28, Eva’s donned many hats since her career started. The actress is currently five months into playing Daisy Buchanan on the first-ever theater staging of The Great Gatsby on Broadway. Across her roles, which differ from strong-willed young women struggling under the weight of the world to affluent socialites careless with their privilege, Eva wants to impart a sense of humanity and authenticity to each character—and that means letting go of her idea of perfection.
@hadestownmusical A belt for the gods. Quite literally. #hadestown #broadway #neverstopexploring #theatre @livevamaria #evanoblezada ♬ original sound – Hadestown
“Sometimes, you’re being pressured to be ‘on’ all the time—to be perfect,” she shares. “I don’t believe in those things anymore, because they’re not attainable. There’s no such thing as being perfect.”
Holding onto a dangerous ideal of perfection did nothing but bring her shame, a sentiment anyone could relate to. After all, who defines what perfect is? All we end up doing is punishing ourselves for not reaching a certain standard. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t try to excel. Through it all, Eva is a professional. She’s committed to doing her best on stage, and sometimes that requires a delicate balancing act.
“My job is to be an actor,” she says. “Which means I have to be human—and humans aren’t perfect.”
SHOWING UP FOR YOURSELF
Photo by Matthew Murphy
Eva has been open about her own struggles with mental health, eating disorders, and body image, exacerbated by the demands of the industry she works in. Artists and performers know it takes a lot to be able to perform—the physical, mental, and emotional stress is nothing short of overwhelming. People have different ways of dealing with it, but for Eva, who feels very deeply, learning how to deal with all that she feels and thinks required some tough self-reflection.
“Being an emotional, sensitive person—it is a superpower,” she notes. “But you have to be strong. As emotionally vulnerable as I am, I want to equally be strong and be confident that my emotions, or when I feel overwhelmed, it doesn’t interact negatively with my job.”
Developing “very strong boundaries” with herself wasn’t just an effort to be professional. It was a conscious choice to be able to deal with all the pressures and stress in a healthy way.
Photo by Matthew Murphy and Evan Zimmerman
“There are moments where I know I have to be compassionate with myself if I’m going through something difficult, and there are moments where I go, ‘you know what, bitch, get up, let’s go—you’re a bad bitch, and it’s time to get up and go.'” Donning a version of “Eva” that knows exactly what to say to herself has allowed her to recognize her own needs as a person and face every challenge head-on, but not without consideration.
She knows when it’s time to haul herself up and be the fire in the room, when it’s time to self-soothe, when it’s time to release her emotions, and when it’s time to take a day. And for someone in an industry that literally has the motto, “the show must go on,” that’s a refreshing trait to hold onto.
TAKING A BREATH
Photo by Matthew Murphy and Evan Zimmerman
It’s inevitable that the personal crosses over into the professional, especially in Eva’s line of work. The more an actor taps into the feelings required for a scene, the more the line blurs between reality and fiction—after all, humans, fictional or otherwise, share the same expanse of emotion.
“There are certain moments where all the pressure I’m putting on myself, all this guilt and grief—I ask myself, ‘how can I bring this out whilst also being authentic to my character?'” Balancing her own feelings with the feelings her character must feel in the moment allows her to experience a sort of “release” that then helps with her own personal struggles. Theater becomes an outlet.
“It’s also important to me to have a healthy release when I come home from work,” she adds. “Painting, watching Studio Ghibli films, taking a nap, eating something good—things that bring me back down to myself lets my body know that ‘oh, Eva’s taking a breath now. Leave Daisy in the theater.'”
Photo by Matthew Murphy and Evan Zimmerman
The actress has a refreshing perspective regarding taking care of herself when it comes to the high pressures of her career. When asked about “pushing through” all the pressure and the struggles, as most people are wont to do, she responds with, “I don’t want to have to push.”
“I want to just be,” she continues. “I want to be present—or I want to release something that’s not allowing me to be present.” Being present, aware of herself, her power and agency, and all that is around her. It casts away all the pressures and expectations, worries and stresses, distractions and disruptions from her mind. It lets her breathe easy, engaged with the here and now.
Photo by Matthew Murphy and Evan Zimmerman
“One thing I’ve been working on that’s been so rewarding and so difficult is slowing down,” Eva says. “The beautiful thing about slowing down is that it gives you that moment to breathe, connect with yourself, and observe. You have a chance to go, ‘how do I want to respond to this?'” Taking the time to unravel and examine things helps her as an actor and as a person, but she also allows herself to just let all the thoughts and feelings flow over her like a river.
In this fast-paced world we find ourselves stumbling through, slowing down is severely underrated. Everything’s always go, go, go, do this, do that, catch up—but going at such a breakneck speed, whether in our career or in life in general, doesn’t leave a lot of room for anything else, much less taking care of ourselves. But Eva Noblezada has learned to give herself some grace. Perhaps it’s time we do, too.
Images courtesy of Vivacity Media Group.
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