As if we couldn’t love Andrew Garfield anymore, he’s out here showing us a healthy way to process grief and loss.
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For someone who has no social media accounts, Andrew Garfield is one of the internet’s favorite main characters. But then it’s Andrew Garfield we’re talking about. His filmography? *Chef’s kiss*. His personality? A1. His Chicken Shop Date episode? Already one of the best rom-coms of the decade. And him posing with a cardboard cutout of his co-star Florence Pugh at the London premiere of their new movie, We Live In Time? Another level of wholesome. But if that wasn’t enough, the actor has been winning even more hearts, not for a new project and photoshoot, but by giving us a poignant and heartfelt reminder that grief isn’t a blackhole some assume it to be.
“YOU REALLY LOVED SOMEONE WHEN YOU MISS THEM”
Elmo is here to listen. Elmo loves you, Mr. Andrew Garfield! ❤️ #EmotionalWellBeing pic.twitter.com/rW86tR5Gof
— Elmo (@elmo) October 18, 2024
Sesame Street, the timeless kids show that somehow always knows what to say to us no matter what stage of life we are in, recently dropped a new video featuring Andrew and Elmo. The actor brought up that he’s been thinking about his mom, who passed away from pancreatic cancer a few years ago, and he’s been missing her. As Elmo shared his condolences, Andrew conveyed his thoughts on missing someone, seeing the emotion as more of a positive than anything else.
“That sadness is kind of a gift, it’s kind of a lovely thing to feel in a way because it means you really loved someone when you miss them. When I miss my mum, I remember all the cuddles I used to get from her, all of the hugs I used to get from her and it makes me feel close to her when I miss her.”
He added that the memories he keeps of his mom make him happy because it reminds him of the love they both have for each other. “When I miss her I remember it’s because she made me so happy so I can celebrate her and I can miss her at the same time.” Cue the internet’s collective tears.
We all experience grief at one point or another in our lives as dealing with the loss of someone special can feel so soul-crushing. We tend to be so hard on ourselves and see grief as an excuse to distance ourselves from the world and fill our hearts with a sadness that weighs us down. And while we all process grief differently, Andrew, in a showcase of his boundless emotional intelligence and gentleness, reminds us that grief can also be something good and a way to find love in your heart. Give yourself the space and grace to feel your feels, but know that grief isn’t something to be scared of nor just wallowing in sadness.
It’s also commendable that this is coming from a male figure of Andrew Garfield’s status considering that young men are often bombarded with toxic messages that showing emotion is a sign of weakness and they need to constantly dominate. We’re here for this positive and gentle mindset on processing your emotions.
A BEAUTIFUL KIND OF THOUGHTFULNESS
This isn’t the first time Andrew opened up about his relationship with grief. In an interview with Yahoo Entertainment, the actor implored people not to let the fear of grief “lock ourselves off from love, from risk & from truly living fully because it hurts to live fully.”
Understanding that the fear of loss is never far behind when loving someone, he shared how that shouldn’t be the reason not to love, because even in grief, you can still find the space to make your heart happy.
“It hurts to love fully — it hurts to attach because of the inevitability of the loss that comes with it. But it’s the only way. It’s the only way to live a life of vitality and fullness and meaning, and it breaks the kind of calcified, protected, hardened versions of our heart open so we can reconnect to ourselves. So anyway, I just think grief is a really cool portal into our hearts, so then we can feel the love as well.”
And in an appearance on The Late Show With Stephen Colbert, the actor, who was then promoting his movie Tick, Tick… Boom!, shared how the project helped him process his mom’s passing. “This is all the unexpressed love, the grief that will remain with us until we pass because we never get enough time with each other, no matter if someone lives till 60, 15, or 99.” He added, “So I hope this grief stays with me because it’s all the unexpressed love that I didn’t get to tell her.”
Andrew Garfield, the man that you are. Grief is one of the most daunting emotions we can face. But more than just seeing it as a loss of a core part of who we are, grief reveals itself as love persevering, a sign that the love is never going away. So celebrate the people we miss because there’s only love here. Now who’s cutting onions?
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