Why is everyone talking about taxi cabs on TikTok? And what does it have to do with relationships?
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Going through heartbreak can be heavy, especially after going through a relationship (or worse, a situationship) that just didn’t work out. This can be extra painful if your partner isn’t ready to commit. But such is life, and you eventually go your separate ways. Then, picture this: After a while, you’re online and going through your social media. Wait, woah. Is your ex in a committed relationship? Right after they said they didn’t want to have one with you?
It can be stinging to see that happen, and it seems that TikTok found a way to explain that feeling with a new theory making the rounds on social media. Meet The Taxi Cab Theory. You might have seen people yap about it online or mentioned it in the comments section. They might have referenced it when talking about their personal dating life, or they might have gossiped about celebs that might have proved its existence. But what exactly does it mean in the dating space? We’re here to break it down.
MIRANDA HOBBES, LAWYER & PIONEER
@thereal_aliceb “Men are like cabs; when they're available, their light goes on. They wake up one day and decide they're ready to settle down, have babies, (whatever), and they turn their light on. [The] next woman they pickup, boom! That's the one they'll marry". – Miranda Hobbes
♬ original sound – Alice Borlongan
Sex and the City is an iconic show that contributed so much to pop culture, and they also have a hand in creating this theory. Miranda brought the idea up in Season 3, Episode 8: The Big Time. Miranda brings the theory up when Charlotte is convinced she’ll marry Trey, that it’s fate. Miranda chimes in, saying that it isn’t fate- but that his “lights” are on. She explains that men are like cabs, that their lights go on when they’re ready to settle. When they find the next woman to pick up, that’s the one they’ll marry. SATC always at the scene of the crime.
This theory poses the idea that men aren’t willing to commit themselves until that sudden shift happens. Basically, the theory views men and their dating habits through the lens of a taxi cab. If they’re ready to commit and settle down, the lights are turned on so to say. But if they aren’t, no amount of effort can make them change their minds. However, what makes the theory particularly interesting is that she mentions that it’s “dumb luck.”, implying it’s more about the timing of everything.
GETTING OFF AT THE LAST STOP
The episode came out in the year 2000, and let’s face it, not everything always ages well. But this theory seems to have stuck around, with many people sharing their stories of getting dropped off before seeing their exes commit to other people afterward. The disappointment of realizing you weren’t “the one” makes you wonder if you were just a detour, a side quest, or a stopover to the final destination. All these what ifs can bring up a lot of uncomfortable questions, which is why such a personal experience continues to resonate with so many young people.
The theory has seemed to evolve, with people saying it’s not just guys who do this, though men are usually still centered in the conversation. This, partnered with the current dating climate, makes it even more challenging for people to place proper labels or see eye-to-eye when settling down. While it makes some fair points, some netizens have mentioned that the theory isn’t an appropriate way to define such an experience fully. Some view it as simply another case of “right person, wrong time.”
RIGHT PERSON, WRONG TIME?
While this theory might help people navigate their feelings through similar experiences, perhaps it’s not the end-all-be-all explanation. Miranda’s original theory was more about luck rather than observing genuine change in people. Even if two people were compatible in a relationship, who’s to say their current situation would work out long-term? While it can be upsetting to see your ex settle with someone else, it doesn’t automatically mean you weren’t good enough for them or that you were a bad partner.
The theory’s biggest flaw is that it primarily considers one person’s perspective. We won’t always get to know what the other person was thinking in the relationship. If anything, it might be unfair for you to be with someone who doesn’t align with your desires. There’s a big chance that it’s no one’s fault. The only “crime” really committed is wanting different things at different times. While the theory occasionally hits, what’s more important is recognizing the nuances a situation like this carries. So, if you just got dropped off at your stop, don’t worry. There’s always a ride that will eventually take you to your destination.
Continue Reading: He’s Loyal, But… 8 Signs You Should Consider Breaking Up With Your Boyfriend Even Though He’s Not Cheating
